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Last week I took the plunge. I joined www.facebook.com just like everyone around had said I should do. The first day I was hooked. I found “friends” that I have not talked to in years. I found people just wanting to be nosy and people I do not even know trying to be my friend. Perhaps I did know them at one point but my mommy mind has blocked them out. I found that I was popular for the first time ever. People wanted to be my “friend”. I chatted a lot and I explored. Now it has been a week and the hype has died down a bit.
Do not get me wrong. It was great catching up with people who I have not talked to in 10 years. They are all starting to have babies now and are telling of their wonderful jobs. A part of me has become jealous. I opted to stay home with my kids and never had a career out of college. These are people that I “lost touch with”. The question remains did we loose touch or loose interest?
I have a friend who always has told me that at some point you outgrow certain friends. Your paths move differently. It can be a slow process or it can be as fast as graduating from college. Either way those friendships are lost forever. With this in mind I have now entered a whole world of these friends whom I have “out grown”. I honestly do not care to remember many of the stupid things we did and did not even like some of them when I was their “friend”. I know that we are all having the same thoughts but no one is willing to admit it.
So the question becomes can we grow back into a friend? These people who we had less and less in common with have changed as have I. So do we see if we are back at similar points in life or do we sit and have a few memories and move on from it? This is the Facebook question that it perplexing to me. I am not sure of the answer.
So for now I am talking to people whom I had forgotten about, people that I have wondered about and people I had no use for 10 years ago. I think that it will all be quite interesting in the end to see if anything comes of any of it.
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What I really say is that sometimes you can have friends who are “forever”. But sometimes, you are close friends with people for just a period of time- like in college. It is not that these people are not loyal and loving at the time, but we mature and our lives take us on different paths.
I have one friend that drifts in and out of my life and every time we do hook up- we are in that same place and it is like no lost time. I think that is my longest (if not closest) running friendship. I have recently had to deal with changes in who I thought was a friend and left me feeling abandonded. I have made some changes in my life and have found out that I have true friends who share their lives openly with me and are there for me no matter what mess I get myself in. These people count. I will treasure them for life.
In facebook, (which Becca dragged me in), I found my nephew and my sister in law. I wonder if certain people I knew long ago are on and I wonder what they are doing. It would be nice to test the waters and see who you connect with and see if you can have a friendship that is based on who you are today.
I am still cautious and really do not want to be public with my page. Employers research on the internet, investigators, lawyers, etc… I just think that we are in an age where we are still trying to figure it out.
Who said you were the friend that I was referring to… Kinds of presumptuous! You bring up another good point as far as employers searching it. Luckily I am not in a career position at this point and so not have to worry to much about that. I can close it when I do!
Becca
I feel the same way. I have friends that are on there that I never talked to and then some when we parted our ways we just did that and went on to make new friends. Went back to our high school reunion and it was like high school but older drunks, and snotty people trying to be your friend.